The Trip

A couple months ago I booked time off from work. November 11th. A Thursday. So then I thought that I would take off Friday as well.

An extra long weekend. A treat. I would spend the extra time with John.

And then life overwhelmed me.

I thought maybe we could all take a weekend getaway. A little family time.

And then work stressed me.

I thought maybe we could do something special as a family.

And then the realization that November was killing me.

So Steven suggested that I go away by myself. To treat myself to some "me" time.

I thought of three places where I wanted to go:

Victoria, to visit my friend Alaysha

Trail, to visit my sister-in-law Barb
Minneapolis, to visit my sister Dawna

I sucked it up and paid for an airline ticket and emailed Dawna.

At the airport

On the way to her condo

The view from her balcony

She lives in a great neighborhood. She had to go back to work for the afternoon so I walked around and poked around the shops and grabbed some lunch. There's a bookstore that I would kill to have in my city. There's a tiny door cut into the regular door so kids can open/shut it. And there's chickens. Yes, chickens. Walking around. Loose. CHICKENS. John would have loved it.

Her Royal Highness, Abbott

This is where the geese go in the winter. Dumb asses. You'd think they would fly somewhere warm.

Other people ask to go to The Mall of America. Or museums. Or even the place where Mary Tyler Moore threw her hat in the air.

But no. I wanted to go to Victoria's Secret, Target and White Castle.

I'm so white trash. Or perhaps in my case, yellow trash.

Would I go there again? Probably not.

And then, holy mother of God, it snowed. I cursed. I mean, c'mon. I actually prepared for the trip, I checked the weather network for the long term forecast. I packed a friggin rain jacket because they forecast RAIN. NOT SNOW. The bus is sucked right up on that power pole. But later in the day we got motivated and went to Psycho Suzi's. The only other thing that I wanted to do. I saw it featured on the TV show Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. But wow, the snow was incredible. I didn't realize how much it had actually snowed. Check it out! The snow was so wet & heavy that there were trees down everywhere. Yipee!

For the record, only two drinks were mine. But truth be told, at the end of the afternoon I did have 4 drinks total.

I'm so glad I was able to get away. It was a wonderful stress reliever. It was awesome to visit Dawna and see her condo. I missed John & Steven but I really needed the mini-vacation. Next time the whole family will go.

The November Blues

November will forever be a difficult month for me.

The Gathering

You can shed tears that I have gone,

or you can smile because I have lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that I'll come back,

or you can open your eyes and see all I have left.

Your heart can by empty, because you can't see me,

or you can be full of the love we shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,

or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember me and only that I've gone,

or you can cherish my memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back,

or you can do what I'd want:

Smile, open your eyes, love and go on.

Author Unknown

This poem was read when I attended group therapy. The gal that read this had also lost her mother and was struggling with unanswered questions, the hopelessness and the utter heartbreak.

I still have highs and lows. Thankfully the highs are becoming more frequent but the blues are still there. I doubt if they will ever go away completely.

I still feel like I am that woman that lost both her parents within a year of each other.
Sometimes I still feel like I am adrift in the world.
Like the world is moving forward without me.
Like I am constantly struggling to keep up with life.
Like everyone has forgotten me.

Argh - What? It's Not Pirate Day?

Man, every day should be talk like a pirate day.

Sadly, this was just a normal Sunday night for us.

Ya scurvy dog.

Contrary to what Steven may say....the treasure is NOT in my booty.

Elmo

So awhile back I came home from work and John's nose was bright red. Like he had, oh I don't know, colored his nose or something.

Steven couldn't think of why his nose was red. Why oh why.

And then, "oh yeah". Earlier in the day apparently John had decided to crawl around the floor. Crawl around with his nose.

The next day John's nose was a scab.

See?

My nose.

My poor, poor nose.
But Elmo's nose is okay.

Play Elmo Hands Mama. Elmo Hands.

Can you see how cute I am?
I know, my nose is all scab-y.
But see how cute I am?

I'm dancing like Elmo showed me.
Elmo Hands. (a little like Jazz Hands for the toddler-set)

10x better dance moves than his daddy.

Look how old he looks.
My baby.

Say Cheese.

Happy Belated Halloween!

Happy Halloween. 231 kids. Can you even believe it? I know, insane isn't it? My friend Crystal came over again this year to hand out treats for us so both Steven & I could both take John out.

Steven carved all three pumpkins this year. I was too busy trying to clean the house and make dinner. Too bad because I LOVE carving the pumpkin.

This one's great. The pumpkins are glowing. Awesome, no? One pumpkin..ahahahaha. Here's our little Woody and his horse Bullseye. Yes, we all dressed up. We're that family. I wish we would have thought to have Riley in the picture.



You'd think that this picture was the after effect of too much candy but this was actually a before picture.
This year, John totally understood Hallowe'en.

Did you know that Woody didn't have a gun?

Yeah, me neither. Cheesy, Sears catalogue photo!
Poor John, I made him pose for so many pictures. The first treat allowed. He kept making "yum" "good" noises while he ate his bag of chips.
Happy Hallowe'en!